A double negative can be positive


During one ten year (evil?) spell, my kitchen’s built in electric oven managed to burn out three baking elements… each time in a dramatic, 220 volt flash of bright light.

Anyway, the last time that occurred (early 2010), I vowed it would be the last time. I’d have to be nuts to, ever again, get suckered into replacing one unreliable part with another… a component likely riddled with an inherent design flaw and/or shoddy workmanship. There’s even an apt, time-honored proverb that has my back…

“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.”

There’s not even a contingency for a third time, mainly because nobody should ever be THAT foolish.

Well, it was soon afterwards that I switched the circuit breaker to “off” and repurposed this lemon of an oven into an additional storage compartment for pots and pans and its open door as a much needed additional workspace.

The bad news was that, just as I had begun my search for a new oven, many an appliance dealer told me that manufacturers no longer offer models small enough to neatly slide into my kitchen’s existing hardwood cabinetry. Long sigh.

Not wanting to incur the dust and debt of a major kitchen remodel… the bad news snowballed. No oven meant I could no longer bake, made from scratch, homemade bread, dinner rolls, pizzas and apple kuchens.

And so, I’ve settled for less… i.e., gone the toast route… well… that is until just recently. Alas, just as the pandemic had driven us into quarantine, my damned toaster went kaput. Now, I’ve gotta ask, just how the hell does such a device… and a reputable name-brand model at that… ever give up the ghost?

Seeing how I’d never want to become a COVID-19 ghost, I’ve had to back-burner toaster shopping, too.

And so, once more, I’ve settled for less… or might that be more? Lately, I started utilizing my double boiler to warm up store bought bread… usually configured as PB&J and jam only sandwiches.

I’ve gotta tell ya, this has been like a blast out of my distant past. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear I’ve been scarfing down fresh outta the oven, made from scratch bread, which is nearly identical to what I used to bake.

Who’d have ever believed it possible that dual appliance breakdowns could prove an unlikely point… namely…

A double negative can be positive.


Stay Safe at Home! Stay Publicly Masked! Stay Healthy!