The Beacon Beckons

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Star light, star bright, of the night
Light years distant, that ain’t slight
Can’t help but wonder if it might
Possess a planet that’s just right

To become a prison locked up tight
To lodge a madman who’s a fright
To end his pointless warfare’s fight
To mend his horrors hardship blight

To ease besieged land’s awful plight
Let’s launch Vlad villain out of sight
Steer his spaceship’s one-way flight
Towards that distant star light bright

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Eggs-istential Enigma (Part 2)

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If you missed Part 1, the next paragraph will get you up to speed…

On 03/16/22, I made a ginormous grocery purchase; grand total $282. Sensing something not so grand had happened, I carefully unpacked and organized that haul atop my dining room table, kitchen countertops and refrigerator shelves. With the register receipt as my guide, I checked off the matching items; by audit’s end discovering the cashier had overcharged me nearly $15 by ringing up 5 phantom items; i.e., 5 cartons of eggs when, in reality, I had NOT purchased any eggs at all!

Hence, this existential / Eggs-istential Enigma:

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Just how the hell does a NON-EXISTENT barcode get scanned
and, even more mind-boggling, NOT ONCE BUT FIVE TIMES?

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I had asked you, my readers, if you had any theories, especially those which might even exonerate / eggs-onerate the cashier of willful wrongdoing, BUT, with nary a comment these past two weeks, looks like I’ll be going it alone…

For starters, let’s attempt to clear the cashier…

Suppose her whip cracking boss has been demanding she work faster? It’s conceivable my struggling to reload bagged groceries into my shopping cart had slowed things down so much that, PRIOR to her properly finalizing my transaction, she began scanning the next customer’s purchase; hence, charging me for those damned eggs.

Next up, the dishonest cashier scenario…

Seeing how Easter Egg “hunting season” is nearly upon us, suppose my cashier’s bestie has been planning such a gathering “on the cheap”? Considering all the foul, fowl aspects of this caper, perhaps saying, “on the cheep”, would be more apropos? Anyway, the cashier’s MO would be to [1] let her accomplice breeze thru the checkout, sans scanning her eggs and [2] as a means to ease guilt about ripping off her employer, she’d make a patsy out of any patron making a huge purchase (going on the assumption that I’d be what? Too well-to-do and/or distracted and/or dense to ever realize I’d been ripped off?

Lastly, the cocky corporate clucker scenario…

Suppose the Dairy Department had accidentally smashed an entire egg shipment. Ergo, to recoup their loss, some corporate bean counter hatched a scam to corrupt the scanner software; program it to [1] morph unsuspecting patrons into patsies, [2] profile out-of-towners making ginormous purchases, [3] tack on 5 fake cartons of eggs to such purchases; all going on the assumption that we’d be what? Too well-to-do and/or distracted and/or dense to ever figure out we’d been ripped off?

Granted, such theories tend to sound unsound. As if invented by what? A chicken running about with its head cut off? Well, I suppose such a suspicious nature stems from my nearly lifelong exposure to reportage of Big Gov shenanigans / Big Biz swindling. Factoring in 3 decades’ worth of retail salesclerk / management indoctrination (re detecting / preventing internal theft) and voilà!

Anyway, it’d appear that such misery does love company. How so?

Well, one week ago, instead of registering my register overcharge complaint at the store, I phoned it in. My first request of Mary, the customer service rep, was that she retrieve my receipt’s image from their database. Bottom line, Mary was just as mystified as I was (still am) that a cashier could, somehow, scan not 1 but 5 NON-EXISTENT barcodes.

Tho Mary could not send me a cash refund thru the mail, she did offer the next best thing; to issue and dispatch a store gift card, which, btw, is now stashed in my wallet.

Little doubt, after I had hung up, Mary’s next phone conversation involved their company’s loss prevention manager, who’ll soon be paying a visit to question the, perhaps, questionable cashier?

Alas, in a pre-pandemic, slightly more civil era, grocery shopping used to be a yawner; the drama just as non-existent as those five phantom barcodes. Oh, how I yearn to return to those bygone, carefree days of yore.

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A Definition for the Word “Woman”?

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“On February 25, 2022, President Joe Biden announced that he would nominate Ketanji Brown Jackson to the position of Associate Justice of the Supreme Court of the United States to fill the upcoming vacancy by Stephen Breyer, who announced his retirement on January 27, 2022 at the age of 83.”

Wikipedia [Read More Here]

During last week’s U.S. Senate confirmation hearings, numerous Republican thespians, cast… correction… miscast in the role of legitimate legislators* posed questions to Ketanji Brown Jackson, which had little to no relevance to either verifying her stellar qualifications or evaluating her, essentially, flawless character. These bad actors’ actual intent was to raise the curtain on their political theatre, and in the process…

a. repurpose KBJ as their prop / property
b, vent deplorable male white supremacy
c. both bore / browbeat a person of color
d. all of the above

(btw, If you chose “d” go to the head of the class.)

* btw, I’ve granted them anonymity because they’ve already embarrassed themselves enough already. Beyond that, by and large, they’re all cookie cutter interchangeable; i.e., to know one grotesque Trumper Republican is to know ‘em all.

Of course, seeing how, at the very least, you do need one specific sample re their repulsive rhetoric, check out the following actual “Q” and “A”…

Senator (who identifies as a woman): “Can you provide a definition for the word ‘woman’?”
Ketanji Brown Jackson: “I’m not a biologist.”

While her “A” proved to be professionalism at its very finest, were anyone to ever pose such a “Q” to this layperson, check out my “A”…

CommonSenseTom: “Why not directly ask each human who identifies as such a being?”

My point being that each individual, who identifies as being a woman, likely harbors a uniquely personal definition; thereby making it absolutely none of my business (especially since I’m a man). I’d never have the audacity to assign, to anyone, the far too limiting / restrictive parameters; e.g., those typically presented within male sexist authored, plumbing only textbooks.

And, for that matter, seeing how ONLY one’s own primary care physician and other medical specialists should be allowed that privilege, that means that all laypersons, especially politicians and media political pundits, must BUTT OUT and STAY OUT, STAT!

Beyond that, with America now being a scant four years away from its 250th birthday, there’s no time like the present for We the New Millennium’s People to revise the following passage FROM THIS:

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

Founding Fathers / authors of America’s Declaration of Independence

TO THIS:

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all people are created equal, that they are endowed with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness; regardless of the contents of their private ‘drawers.”

18th Century Founding Fathers + 21st Century CommonSenseTom (Paine)

Granted, there’s probably a far more delicate, decorous way to express an underwear reference, but, hey, it’s the heartfelt, heady spirit of inclusiveness that really matters, right?

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Mere Stickers / Masks Trigger Right

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Hey everybody, let’s all set a spell to spell out the prob; i.e., call out a particular, peculiar, persnickety, pissed off x-prez’s pernicious plot to promote propaganda that’ll prop up the programming of his patsies.

Wow, there’s so much “P” in that lead paragraph, perhaps, we should go the urinalysis route?

Anyway, we are speaking of that palavering putz who’s prone to preen before his boudoir vanity’s luridly illuminated looking glass; i.e., the distorting carnival mirror situated dead-center within his very own, self-made, mucked up multiverse.

Yep, ever since Election Day / Night 2020, that has-been has been fabricating fake news, which (as I type and you read these words) is still persuading his pawns, puppets and pigeons to go-off-the-deep end; to giddily take the plunge into his disgusting, dystopian cesspool.

Q: So, what’s the more sensible bystander to do?

A: Well, for starters, we must better understand how our persevering (albeit precariously) hinges upon presenting / prolonging our own low profiles.

Q: How low must we go?

A: In actuality, we’ll be going the high road route. Unless we’re “reading” the duped as hardcore, powder kegs, simply humoring simpletons can work wonders.

Q: How so?

A: Be aware of the visuals which, typically, trigger their rage.

Q: Such as?

A: Stunningly, it’s oft the teensy tiniest of issues; the type that require only easy-peasy remedial actions; to flesh all that out…

PROBLEM #1: This encompasses Donny’s ongoing Big Lie; i.e., his barren of all evidence, sorry-ass allegations that absentee ballots led to widespread voter fraud; thereby denying him reelection. His not being (unconstitutionally) reinstated as prez can only further upset them.

SOLUTION #1: We must never revel in American Democracy; i.e., don our “I Voted” and “I Voted Absentee Ballot” lapel stickers to remind Donny’s dense devotees that Democrat Joe Biden, fair and square, won the presidency.

PROBLEM #2: Those of us who are still wearing our pandemic masks to help save the lives of our world’s billions of still unvaxxed souls (btw, be we vaxxed or unvaxxed, we can still shed and spread the coronavirus and its variants).

SOLUTION #2: It’d behoove us all to to brush up on our self-depricating humor. Let’s say that a forever Trumper goes ballistic. We should trot out our own Big Lie such as this one-liner:

  • Hey, I’m simply beautifying America by not exposing my ugly mug.

If that one falls flat on its face, try uttering this utter nonsense.

  • Hey, you gotta agree that masks make it tougher for dem damn Dems to identify us.

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Sickening Quickening: Quick Limerick

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Fascists’ life cycle / lifestyle; one fast fact
How they gestate (sans iota of tact)
To pop / poop out their species,
Involves shedloads of feces,
Their Birth Canal; the Intestinal Tract

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Tags: blogging, liberal limericks, Listener Limerick Challenge, NPR, NPR’s Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me, one quick limerick, Peter Sagal, poetry, political limericks, politics, wait wait don’t tell me, WordPress,

Russia’s Endgame? (Quick Limerick)

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Putin’s Achilles’ Heel: hubris and hate
Zelenskyy’s Spine: grit, integrity; great
Ze’s* 4-Dimensional Chess
Checks Madimir’s* Checkers mess
Russia’s Endgame? Mushroom Clouded Checkmate?

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* “official” nicknames of hero Zelenskyy and zero Putin

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1,000,000+ U.S. Covid-19 Deaths!

According to the Roylab statisticians, the (known) Covid-19, U.S. fatalities just reached and exceeded the one million mark on this very day, Wednesday, March 23, 2022. The YouTube, video which as been topping off my homepage since May 2020 will not only corroborate that grim stat, but also report all the other national totals, worldwide.

Let’s find some quiet time, today, to pay our respects; to consider the mourners’ broken hearts not just in America, but planetwide.

The needless tragedy, here, is that had all of us been promptly and properly masking up, right from the get-go, we could’ve saved a significant percentage of these people.

The truth, here, is that be one vaxxed or unvaxxed, it is totally possible to be an asymptomatic shedder and spreader of the coronavirus; which means that the longer that mutating pathogen hangs around, the odds increase that a variant could arise; perhaps one which can and will render all the available vaccines useless.

That’s why I, personally, will never, ever show up mask-less within any public indoor venue.

If we ever hope to finally end this god awful pandemic, all 7.9 billion of us must view the face mask as the piece of illness preventing, life saving, death defying fabric that it truly is.

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So-and-So

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Sociopathic, so-and-so, societal scourge, S.O.B.
Vladimir solicited Satan who, in turn, stole the
sole, so-called soul from every out for a stroll,
near a Ukraine shallow shoal* Russian soldier.

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*elsewhere too

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Carlson’s Carnage

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The irony of free speech / free press rights is that, when the bereft of all human decency, betrayers of Democracy exercise… correction… exploit them, egregiously so, they risk exterminating the very document that guarantees these 1st Amendment protections.

Case in point…

The Fox Network’s talking head / head case, one Tucker Carlson, has become a lump of malleable clay / pliable play dough in the hands of one Vladimir Putin, the strong-arm, who has not even needed to utilize his iron fist grip to facilely fashion that Tucker into Russia’s propagandist newbie.

Indeed, as I type and you read these words, the utterances of Putin’s patsy / protégé are being exploited in an attempt to [1] firm up Russian troops’ flaccid morale and [2] demoralize Ukraine’s indefatigable freedom fighters.

The very notion of that verbal venture, exemplifies just how unconscionable, unforgivable and un-American Carlson’s screechy screeds actually are; how such stench fails to pass the protected free speech sniff test.

After all, what that hack, Tucker, is up to is akin to shouting “FIRE” in a crowded theater; where no such conflagration exists; an action that’d absolutely result in needless injuries and fatalities.

More to the point…

Traitor Tucker is now shouting, “FIRE!” within Putin’s Ukraine theater of war; pointlessly perpetrating and perpetuating carnage and property damage; and as such, he’s become complicit in Putin’s crimes against humanity.

Tucker Carlson now has, on his own hands, the indelible blood red stain of Putin’s pointless war.

Seeing how, nowadays, nowhere within this Earthly realm, do right wing extremists ever get raked over the coals (re their treachery), perhaps, someday, he’ll be invited to attend Beelzebub’s “barbecue” (no asbestos attire allowed)?

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