New LEGAL Contraceptive Method!

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As most Americans have become painfully aware, by now, six extreme “justices”, who park their behinds behind the U.S. Supreme… correction… Extreme Court bench, have opted to overturn Roe v. Wade (make abortion illegal) and, as such, they now absolutely demand that nearly every functional womb starts popping out babies one or more at a time; every nine months… uh… even if it kills the mother-to-be AND whether the “survivors” can afford more mouths to feed or NOT; most likely NOT, considering the bottomless chasm between US, the dirt poor, and THEM, the filthy rich.

Yep, ever ready to do what THEY do best (namely sticking their 6 noses into 330 million crotches), this crotchety, theocratic judicial sextet is far from finished; already hinting that their outlawing of birth control will come next.

All that nasty crap duly noted, believe it or not, the news isn’t all crappy…

Granted, there have yet to be sufficient scientific studies to ascertain just how efficacious the following, brand spanking new birth control method actually is. But, do rest assured, there are, bare minimum, a couple of instantaneous advantages; it’ll do no financial harm AND considering how its “inventors” are all “judges”, this method is all perfectly, quite literally legal.

Do check it out / try it out…

All each amorous couple need do is eyeball photos of “justices” John Roberts, Samuel Alito, Clarence Thomas, Neil Gorsuch, Brett Kavanaugh and Amy Coney Barrett. Hell if visuals of ‘em don’t totally kill the mood, NEARLY nothing else will.

And I do qualify that statement with NEARLY, seeing how, in a pinch, just the mere thought of Donald J. Trump (who appointed / anointed 3 of those 6 crotch sniffers) should work wonders when it comes to overcoming sexual desires. I mean, try making out while puking yer guts out!

Hell, should cooled down couples become a hot new trend, this could easily reduce humankind to an endangered species, heading for extinction classification, which, in turn, would also cool down global warming / Mother Earth.

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Be humans Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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The Party Is Over

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As I commence committing this virtual ink to the virtual parchment’s field of white, I presume that MY… strike that… THEIR two day duration, 50th class reunion had ended at the predesignated, Saturday night into Sunday morn, midnight hour; that (having slept off their hangovers) THEY, who had journeyed, from both near and far, are now (or soon will be) homeward bound; aloft in the unfriendly skies or grounded on the concrete and asphalt thoroughfares.

The operative word being “presume”; seeing how, tho invited, I had opted not to attend. How come?

Long Story Short… Such a decision was/is out of my ongoing deference towards the unpredictable nature of the still rampaging, multiple coronavirus variants, and, more to my main point, was/is totally consistent with my contention…

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Not everyone is dying to relive their K thru 12 experience.

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My intent had been to shun all “classmates” who had actively shunned me as well as the passive types who had “merely looked the other way.” Let’s cut to the chase. Sadistic bullies had mercilessly assaulted me (verbally and physically) from 4th thru 8th grades (inclusive) and had marginalized me thereafter. Hence, my Graduation Day, muttered under the breath, vow to never, ever stagger thru any of their Ground Zero-esque, class reunion rubble.

Short Story Somewhat Longer… the following clickable content will relate the rest of the story. For those with time constraints, I highly recommend Part 2…

Suffice to say, on this “morning after”… now morphing into the afternoon after… I find myself sufficiently curious; oddly awash with second guessing. I cannot help but wonder if, at any point of these weekend festivities, I’d have discovered…

  • Bygone tormentors who had finally grown up enough to behave in a more civil manner?
  • Any of my outcast compatriots scattered amongst the attendees?

All things considered… long sigh… case closed… no real regrets…

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Be people Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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Screwdrivers Turned (Into Drinks)

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The motivation behind this post is my discovery, on this very day, that my new polling place has become an off in the distance church. Stunningly, I can no longer cast my ballots at the public school that’s situated, LITERALLY, right next door to my home!

I suppose this should not be all that surprising; seeing how, ever since Donald J. Trump’s Big Lie was allowed to take root, voter suppression has been rabidly, rapidly becoming the unbecoming (illegal) law of the unAmerican homeland.

  • Looks like I will be voting via absentee ballot from now on.
  • And I will miss copping that, in person, Election Day buzz.

Such a development caused me to consider other maddening, saddening past occurrences; how I’ve been witness to similar annoying changes within my own hometown’s “four corners” / business district; the type one can count on making life both inconvenient and unaffordable.

Little doubt, this is owing to the vast, personal wealth of our past / present City Fathers and Mothers; all of which has not only mutated them into poor city planners but has also rendered them utterly insensitive to the needs of untold, everyday citizens (such as moi).

And seeing how their knack for knuckleheaded decisions even wound up shuttering our local hospital / ER, we are speaking of a LITERAL life and death matter.

To further flesh this out, these high and mighty, empowered dolts think nothing of routinely thumbs upping…

  • Developers who, rather than build affordable housing, joyously erect (starting at) $500K mansions; and butt ugly ones at that! Worse yet, once farmable, fertile soil is getting permanently encased in concrete and asphalt; is now sprouting acres upon acres of useless, picture perfect, manicured, excessively chemicaled grasslands; lawns so toxic the homeowners wind up “pushing up daisies” decades before their time.
  • Big box stores / urban sprawl which has driven out of town (or out of business) many an indie entrepreneur. Absent from our main drag’s business district is the charm of the apparel, shoe, hardware and mom and pop grocery stores. Long gone, too, is our public library; relocated is our Post Office. In their stead, there’s no shortage of swank eateries and cocktail lounges.

Alas, nowadays, at the very heart of town, screwdrivers do not get turned; they get drunk!

Long sigh… all (dis)courtesy of those who get and stay drunk on political power.

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Be people Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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Clear as a Bell (A.G.)

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Preface: It is quite telling how the posting of these very words got delayed, substantially, by tech woes. Here’s the rub…

I live… no… strike that… I exist within a hard-to-believe-this-is-actually-America, tech dead zone; the Land of the Modem’s “light show”, which defiantly blinks red and videos chronically buffer; The Land of the Landline that’s frequently awash with static.

Obviously, red indicators rarely mean ready and raring to go and, clearly, crackling noises are not especially conducive to Clear as a Bell (as in Alexander Graham) conversations.

Factoring in my past drive thru my hometown, it didn’t take me long to troubleshoot…

Part of the Problem… to spot the non-perpendicular, rotting wooden utility poles, strung out with sagging wires. Even more YIKES-worthy, in one case, with nowhere to re-connect the cable, the overwhelmed line technician merely opted to coil it up; to hang it all up (literally and metaphorically); i.e. head back to punch out the time clock and then head off to happy hour to tie one on.

Even critters are too smart to risk life and limb with this infrastructure. Our feathered friends rarely roost / hang out there (be they buzzards, sparrows, or anything in between). As for our furry friends, no pooch would dare to lift his leg there!

Additional Part of the Problem… My alleged Internet Service Provider has a drastically different idea as to what terminology to loosely assign to their disingenuous I – S – P acronym. To e.g. that…

  • I = Inter Net (as in bury)
  • S = Service (only the CEO)
  • P = Promptly bilk / bill Patsies

Indeed, scant days ago, this Patsy promptly paid the monthly bill they had so promptly sent me; all in good faith; i.e., going on the (overly optimistic) assumption that their recent hefty rate hike would wind up prudently targeting their crumbling infrastructure.

In other words, not to further feather the nest of their CEO, who I’ve aptly dubbed Mister Magpie. And it’s a sure bet we’d never discover Mr. M perched atop any of his crummy cables.

Why Magpie?

As we know, magpie, as defined by the New Oxford American Dictionary, is “a person who chatters idly” and, as for chatter, that means “to talk rapidly or incessantly about trivial matters.”

Yep, all in all, that sums up, yet, one more…

Critical Part of the Problem… namely, we, the bill payer patsies, are dealing with communications specialist cons who can only clearly communicate, to us, concisely, how greedy they’ve been, still are, and shall remain forever.

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Be people Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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Streams, Currents and Eddies

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To both paraphrase and “weave” my slight web enhancement into astronomer and author Carl Sagan’s timeless wisdom…

Both books and blogs, like seeds, can lie dormant for lengthy stretches and then flower where and when least expected.

Upon awakening yesterday morn, I discovered such a phenomenon via a WP pingback notification. WOW! Some of my own thoughts, sown nearly six long years ago, had actually taken root and bloomed; all courtesy of a previously unknown (to me) www denizen, who had deemed my content link-worthy; to whom I now extend my undying gratitude.

Such a pingback also solidifies one of my beliefs; namely, that once we channel our sentiments thru the vast www’s streams, currents, eddies, etc., they ripple endlessly. Indeed, courtesy of screenshots and the copy / paste function; or perhaps even via “mere” word of mouth, what we have to say may endure forevermore.

Stated more colloquially…

“They say nothing ever really dies on the Internet!”

They

Hence, in a sense…

We, who www share our intellectual property, just might achieve intellectual immorality.

Well… unless, later today, ignoranuses [sic] opt to launch and instantly lose WW-III.
Well… until ol’ Sol, in its Red Giant death throes, incinerates Earth in 5 Billion years.
Uh… whichever comes first…

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`

Be people Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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Grimmer Than Grimm

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A Grimm-esque bedtime tale; don your nightgown
‘Bout bleach blonde fond of face paint of a clown
Who thrives; connives to drive Libs out of town
Watch his eyes glare, nostrils flare and lips frown

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His tongue wags; vows his fascist crackdown
Plots to roll tanks; watch Democracy drown
Once darkness descends, he’ll don shitty shirt brown
Re-throne his fat ass, For Keeps; NEVER doff crown

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Be people Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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Twenty-Four Skiddoo? Quick Limerick

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PREFACE: It’s so tragic that a verse about President Joe Biden’s reversal of political fortune is even needed, BUT, he did do this to himself. To fill in the particulars, check out both the poetry and prose that follow…

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Pale Blue Biden is too meek; too mellow
Fights for Human Rights? NOPE! Not that fellow!
He’d rather pamper right wingers
Who whip him, middle fingers
MAGA Red OrangeMan soon defeats Joe Yellow?

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Biden’s tanked out approval rating is linked to his impossible quest for bipartisanship with Trumper Republicans. In the process, he’s been sacrificing every iota of his dignity / every vestige of human decency, and, worse yet, screwing over the very voters who empowered him.

Pollsters are already predicting that, come November, Democrats will lose control of both the U.S. House and Senate and, come 2024, will also lose the White House. Worse yet, Biden’s likely successor will be the still unpunished perpetrator of the January 6th Insurrection, the Fascist / narcissist Donald J. Trump who, once installed will NEVER leave office. Alas, Dictatorship will trump Democracy.

Biden could still win back the voters by signing Executive Orders that’d both keep his campaign promises and, even better, not require any Congressional approval.

But, will he?

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Be people Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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Loaded Questions

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Clarification: While I have nothing against hunters, who rely on rifles to “bag” food to feed their families, friends and themselves, my leniency does come to an absolute, abrupt halt at the point where / when so-called hunters [1] feed hungers of a non-nutritional nature, [2] declare Open Season on humankind and [3] arm themselves with take-no-prisoners firepower (the type that’d turn most sovereign nations’ olive drab, uniformed soldiers green with envy).

Preface: It is my own homeland’s gun sick denizens, who have triggered this post; seeing how nary a day goes by without multiple incidents of their gory gun violence (the type which maims and murders Elementary School aged children, church congregants, cineplex denizens, grocery store shoppers, time clock punchers, et al); seeing how, weeks in advance of Father’s Day, several Sporting Goods retailers have been snail mailing out their catalogs; all heavily loaded with images of deadly weaponry.

Oh, btw, some of their past advertising blitzes have aligned with Christmastime, too. Ya damned tootin’; nothing sez, “Happy Birthday Jesus” better than sociopaths shootin’ off their big guns, eh?

My state of mind (understandably loaded with contempt re this sorry state of affairs) also triggers…

Some loaded questions…

  • Just how is it that guns have become such a widespread guy thing?
  • Why do some males feel “incomplete” unless they are packing heat?
  • Did my own father really need to buy his son cap guns and air-rifles?

Indeed, even while my age was still measured in single digits, I had become quite the BB-gun marksman; able to shoot down rows of tin-cans with rapid-fire precision. That I could manage to get a kick out of that, back in that bygone era, does amply demonstrate a magnitude of immaturity that, left unchecked, can and does easily mutate less disciplined kiddies into gun nut “growh-ups”; the very ilk that preys upon today’s Stateside society, as a (w)hole.

Luckily, I did grow / wise up sufficiently to no longer buy into my, otherwise, learned father’s dense indoctrination. Stated more positively I did evolve enough to totally lose interest; eventually developing such a distaste for firearms that, during a recent spring cleaning event, I realized that dealing with my utterly unwanted / unused boyhood “arsenal” was long overdue. That resulted in my opting to disassemble these weapons; spread out the actual disposal over the course of several garbage collection weeks (to reduce any chances of someone, someday, salvaging / reassembling them).

Some final thoughts, loaded questions, too…

  • Who, in their right mind, would ever buy dear old Dad a gun as a Father’s Day present?
  • How many newly armed Dads will wind up training crosshairs, perhaps, on you and me?

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Be people Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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Malaprop Marjorie

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Marjorie Taylor Greene is a certifiable, antisemitic, white supremacist, knuckle-dragger who…

  • Trumpets psycho Donald Trump’s Big Lie about widespread election fraud
  • Idolizes January 6th insurrectionist psychos who stormed the U.S. Capitol
  • Disseminates propaganda in support of psycho Putin’s Ukrainian invasion

Wow! Talk about chronically being on the wrong side of history, eh? Anyway…

Greenhorn Greene, the U.S. Representative for Georgia’s 14th Congressional District, legislates next to nothing that’d ever (even remotely) improve the lives of her everyday-people constituents. That’s owing to the fact that she’d much rather prove her subservience to her obscenely wealthy, corporate pig pals, who own and operate her; who reward her handsomely for her SERVICE to them; for her DISSERVICE to our homeland and home world.

While Greene’s résumé does boast a Bachelor’s degree in Business Admin, about all she’s really good at is giving the business to the people she hates (see lead paragraph to review the demographic details).

Alas, her college degree does not automatically guarantee an ability to think creatively, critically and coherently; all of which rears its ugly head nigh on every time she weighs in on the (oft literally) burning issues of the new millennium; i.e., when she’s hotly denying that climate change is burning up Earth; hotly denying DJT’s Fascistic agenda is burning down a nearly two-and-one-half-century-old nation; one founded on the venerated principles of Democracy and Liberty.

Sadly, Greene not only trots out her ignorance of Science and History with regularity, but, in the process, also murders the English language with her malaprops. To e.g. that, she has referred to Adolf Hitler’s Gestapo as Gazpacho and called a laboratory’s petri dish a “peachtree dish”.

It’s stunning how someone would not wonder WHY a WW-II era, brutal, murderous goon squad would ever be named after a tasty soup? Not wonder WHAT the hell a Peach Tree Dish could possibly be? Should this not instantly pique any REASONABLE person’s curiosity… oh… say… enough to take a few seconds to Google / Fact Check such terminology?

Of course the qualifying word is REASONABLE, so, That Answers That!

BTW, I, myself, am not totally immune to verbal boo-boos / succumbing to malapropism. Hell, I just caught myself typing “peak” instead of “pique” in that above paragraph. Anyway…

The irony, here, is how even sans a Google assist, most High School dropouts would probably already possess sufficient historical and scientific knowledge to not to mix up Gestapo with Gazpacho; petri with peachtree.

The tragedy, here, is how humankind is facing down the concurrent triple threat of Global Warming, a far from over pandemic and an ominously brewing, seething, Stateside fascistic coup. With mere precious seconds remaining to save ourselves from ruin, possible extinction, one thing IS abundantly clear…

There’s absolutely no place, at any governmental level, for the Marjorie Taylor Greenes of our world.

Alas, Greene is up for reelection come November ’22 and, within her blood red, Trumper 14th District, she will wind up a non-bootable shoo-in; an excruciatingly painful kick in humankind’s collective ass.

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Be people Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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Quick Limerick ~ Way To Go?

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PREFACE: Not bellyachin’… just sayin’…

ADDENDUM 06/04/22 05:20a.m…. While it’s true that there have been some rare, notable exceptions (extra special thanks to J.A.) this limerick does sum up my WP site’s typical day-in-the-life doldrums.

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ZERO Views! ZERO Visitors! YIKES!
Ditto ZEROs re Comments & Likes
Guess I will feel all aglow
When analytics all Go
Up to Number 1 / Number 2 spikes!

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Be people Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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