You Expect Me To Do WHAT?

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Oh, the surge of instantaneous incredulity I had experienced upon my jaw-dropping realization that our multiverse’s Creator was already egging on fatherhood for a (barely) 12 year old. How the hell could that Supreme Being ever deem it wise to entrust and endow children (essentially emotional babies) with the power to make babies? Where’s the “Intelligent Design” there, eh?

Seeing how my eyes had been rolling upward, anyway, I did dare to ask Him…

“You expect me to do WHAT?” and “Have you gone effing NUTS?”

Granted I only dropped that F-bomb in this post, for dramatic emphasis, but, were we speaking of more contemporary youths, such language would certainly be commonplace.

Returning to my own youthful exasperation, my focus had been upon the glaring, ongoing paradox; that, nowhere (within any conventional society) existed preteens known to be:

  • highly college degreed and gainfully employed
  • facing down weekday rush hour traffic gridlock
  • seeking soulmates during saloons’ happy hours
  • exchanging till death do they part wedding vows
  • paying rent or mortgage and other monthly bills

Even so, playing house type extracurricular activities did morph a few of my junior high school classmates’ fashion statements to maternity-wear.

Back in that bygone, backward era, a big part of that problem had been how even non-prescription birth control products were never openly displayed. Yep, instead, one would need to engage in awkward negotiations with the oft judgmental pharmacist; such as my own father’s friend (and a Catholic, to boot); the big businessman who, little doubt, would’ve ratted out any boyish man, who’d dare to go on a condom run.

So, all in all, as alluring as sex had been, I knew, fully well, it’d be far easier and infinitely wiser to find the willpower that not all children (not even some childish adults) can manage to muster; let alone master. In other words, to discretely discover acceptable pleasurable alternatives.

If I do say so, myself, it had been quite impressive how someone so young could come to such common sense conclusions, independently; btw, “The Talk” (Dad’s plumbing 101 lecture) transpiring three long years following my “awakening”. Luckily, my own reasoning power did serve me well.

Returning to the somber, sobering here and now, in essence, every post pubescent must learn to readily embrace the #1 Fact of Life; how effing easy it is to conceive babies; how, other than the wildly unpopular abstinence, no contraceptive method is 100 percent goof-proof.

This has all become paramount, especially in the wake of the recent, regressive, Trumpian dominated Supreme Court’s 6-3 decision which has stricken down the previous court’s, 1973 Roe v. Wade ruling. Ergo, once again, abortion is illegal and, by extension, is already sending devastating shock waves throughout American society.

The new reality is Donald J. Trump’s three appointees (namely, Neil Gorsuch, Brett Kavanaugh and Amy Coney Barrett) continue to giddily, sadistically hobnob / collude with the preexisting menaces to society (namely Samuel Alito, Clarence Thomas and John Roberts).

Consequently, America is facing down an ugly, uber-conservative, super majority that could go on for multiple generations to come OR until irreversible environmental collapse overrules them; whichever comes first (likely the latter).

Even the following valid reasons for abortion have been ruled illegitimate:

  • medical complications that threaten patients’ well-being and very lives
  • prenatal tests that reveal the presence of non-survivable birth defects
  • the consequences of grotesque, consanguineous / non-consensual sex

Needless to say, the time is ripe for amorous couples to discretely discover their own acceptable, pleasurable alternatives to intercourse; to additionally, with no exceptions, use birth control; to even double up and triple up combine methods.

And then, upon rolling our eyes upward, each of us must also ask the Big Guy upstairs…

“You Expect Me To Do WHAT?” and “Have you gone effing NUTS?”

And, more to the point, to ultimately query…

“Do you honestly expect anyone to find life fulfilling under the collective, oppressive thumb of your hardcore, theocratic, tyrannical, cretinous creations?”

“Where’s the “intelligent design” there, eh?”

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Be humans Vaxxed OR Unvaxxed, We
can still shed and spread the batcrap
crazy contagious coronavirus which,
in turn, spawns new variants; which,
in turn, could, eventually, render the
available vaccines worthless; which,
in turn, will drag out the pandemic’s
needless suffering, illness and death!

HENCE… this easy as pie, cover your
nose and pie-hole/hole-up heads-up:

Stay Publicly / Properly Masked!
Stay Safe at Home!
Stay Healthy!

-30-

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