On the Sunday Supper Menu: Food For Thought

SUBTITLE: Play the Trump the Trump Toady Game!

This past Sunday evening, just as I was about to sit down at the dinner table, the phone rang.

The caller had actually asked if he could talk to me… by name… even pronouncing my surname correctly! Of course… seeing how a slew of opportunistic, parasitic, scheming and scamming predators have been hijacking my landline for nigh on a decade, I have learned to be evasive / non-committal. Ergo, in my conspicuously wary tone of voice, I answered his question with the question, “Who wants to know?” He then revealed his affiliation with the Michigan branch of the Republican Party.

Yep, just as I had suspected… an opportunistic, parasitic, scheming and scamming predator!

He next disclosed that this call was being monitored / recorded… his menacing tone of voice implying that… if I knew what’s good for me, I had better [1] show him respect (which Trumpians don’t really deserve), [2] genuflect in the presence of His Eminence… or worse yet… [3] cower in front of a card carrying member of the Trumpian Master Race.

He then asked…

Do you think President Trump is doing a great job?

That a pollster would have the audacity to ask such an absurd question… the mere thought that some of those being polled would even answer, “yes”… all royally rankled me. How could anyone be so nose-blind to the Trumpian stench?

I was tempted… oh soooo tempted… to give him an angry earful… to call out his boy Donny as the Nazi / Klansman / Putin suck-up… devoid of ethics, greed driven grifter… poster boy for the NRA and immigrant child abuser that he is… AND the misogynistic / sex offender that he so proudly professed to be / portrayed himself as (corroborated by that now infamous NSFW Access Hollywood video clip).

However… seeing how my dinner was rapidly cooling off… I cooled off, too… and simply hung up on him.

I sure hope that Trumpster pollster interpreted that click in his ear to be my resounding “NO!” But, seeing how such subversives are oft subservient and ignorant, he probably, summarily dismissed it as a “bad connection”.

Well, upon sitting down / chowing down on my victuals… I realized food for thought was on the menu, too.

I could envision a veritable nationwide army of Trump Toadies promptly editing out all nay-sayer respondents while salivating over / savoring upon all of the saved testimonials provided by the glowing, gushing idolaters. I even considered the possibility that the preserved recordings could eventually get played back within earshot of the praise junkie, fake prez… for the express purpose of ceaselessly, repetitiously enrapturing and gratifying him… feeding his massive ego. Giving free rein to my imagination, I even visualized his noggin’s grotesquely, gargantuan tumescence actually taking on a physical manifestation and… depending on the egomaniac’s location… denying him ingress or egress to his white hued digs… resulting in the army corps of engineers’ need to widen all of that edifice’s portals.

After my dessert course, while clearing the dining room table, I further considered the ersatz prez’s desperate, pathetic need to always be the center of attention… how he likely even revels in his negative press. I next mulled over what would happen if… all the sudden… the media were to cease all reportage of all things Trumpian. Little doubt Donny would be devastated.

The mere thought that ignoring that ignoramus could actually be the best way to defeat him started gaining traction… to the point that… by the time I had washed, rinsed, dried and stowed all the dinnertime dishes, silverware, pots and pans… I had come up with my new game plan. During the entire run-up to the 2020 elections I’ll be playing mind games with each and every annoying Trumpster pollster.

Not too far off in the future… here’s how I’ll be playing my new Trump the Trump Toady Game! Check out a sample of the telephone give and take, play by play action…

Bbbrrrring Bbbrrrring… Bbbrrrring Bbbrrrring… Bbbrrrring Bbbrrrring…

“Hello”
“I’m conducting a brief survey on behalf of the Republican Party. Do you think President Trump is doing a great job?”
“Trump you say? President? President of what?”
“Of America.”
“Never heard of him.”
[horrified gasps and sobbing background noises]
[CLICK]

 

 

 

 

 

Burger Flippers Get Vetted Better Than POTUS Wannabes

 

Throughout the primary phase of America’s presidential election year, some voters had become so blinded by Donald Trump’s “DC outsider image” they chose to overlook his severely flawed personality and grotesque ideology. Even worse were the other voters, who actually got turned on by those exact, same, deplorable shortcomings.

Consequently, America is now stuck with a xenophobic, homophobic, misogynistic, narcissistic, pornographic, animalistic, psychotic, undiplomatic, un-presidential candidate… a raving, raging tyrant, who says he’ll ONLY accept the Election Day results if the vote tallies indicate he’s the winner.

And worse yet… some of his more militant supporters might even go on a take no prisoners rampage if he doesn’t win.

Reality Check: Donald would’ve still been in the race had Billy Bush’s Access Hollywood video not gone viral. We have the media to thank for derailing Trump’s crazy train.

As for the future, we must ensure no one, such as Trump, ever gets that close to becoming president again. That same sentiment should also apply to any other federal, state and local government office seekers.

Let’s be practical. Anytime anyone anywhere says to us, “Vote for me”, that person becomes a job applicant. We, who vote, become their prospective bosses. As such, we should vet each candidate the very same way fast-food restaurant and retail managers vet applicants.

Let’s insist that all of our political candidates submit to psychological evaluations and physical exams (inclusive of pee in the cup drug tests). Paying visits to their social media sites ISO telltale tweets, comments, blogs and photos would not be a bad idea, either. Other useful tools would include handwriting analysis, voice stress analyzers, polygraph machines and criminal background checks.

Let’s not mince words… until we implement such a stringent vetting process, we’d actually be far safer entrusting America’s nuclear launch codes to a burger flipper.