A Handy Health Tip (Vid of the Day)

The Fauz Fab Four got a few things wrong in their musical tutorial… namely… they were NEITHER social distancing 2 meters (6 feet) apart NOR masked to compensate for being situated too damned close for comfort.

Additionally… hand sanitizer is for EXTERNAL USE ONLY!

However, apart from their not being situated far enough apart and that bedridden COVID-19 dude’s imbibing of “disinfectant”, their hand washing instructions are totally valid.

 

Stay Safe… Stay Home… Stay Healthy!

 

 

 

 

 

 

The potty humor begins… after this commercial message…

Welcome to our Vid of the Day and greetings / kudos to all of you, who, like me, have been heeding the epidemiologists’ best advice to end the Coronavirus Pandemic… i.e., by hunkering down / social distancing / self-isolating / self-quarantining. If we hang tough, humanity will emerge the victors. In a sense, we, the conscientious civilians, will become the unsung, conquering heroes of this dread disease.

While this does qualify as a sobering moment in human history, it does not necessitate sacrificing our collective sense of humor.

To be sure, this microbial mess has not been without its ludicrous moments… i.e., our bearing witness to the heavily into hoarding mode consumers… in particular… those who’ve been selfishly and needlessly creating an artificial, toilet paper shortage. Admittedly, upon my being recently, suddenly stunned by my local supermarket’s empty shelves… I did nearly start to LOL. However… the levity of the moment did level off, considerably, upon my realization that folks, who really did need to buy T.P., would be S.O.L. Butt… But to get back onto my main topic…

Actual potty humor can likely trace its origins back to the very first unsuspecting hunter / gatherer who had the misfortune of [1] entering a Serengeti grassland that was loaded with partially hidden, animal dung and [2] upon accidentally stepping into it, losing traction, slipping, falling, and winding up face-down in a pile of poop. One can practically hear the eruption of his peers’ guffaws… their, perhaps, subsequent rehashing of this incident, while seated around the dinner hour campfire… the communal, uproarious laughter cast upon the cool night breezes and carried off into the moonlit wilderness.

And… from that day forward the jokes just kept on coming… e.g…

Q. What’s brown and sounds like a bell?
A: DUNG!¹

Q: What does the Enterprise and Toilet paper have in common?
A: They both circle Uranus wiping out Klingons.²

Of course, some creative comedians do add a tad of sophistication within their doo-doo / potty humor. Such content will be clearly evident upon viewing a vintage Carol Burnett Show clip… uh… following this classic commercial message…

To all who’ve stopped by on this day, I wish you well! To all who are ailing, my hopes and prayers for a full, speedy recovery.

Please stay safe by continuing to heed the following common sense, disease fighting advice…

[1] Practice good hygiene (scrub hands often at least 20 seconds), [2] Cover our coughs and sneezes, [3] Avoid touching eyes, nose and mouth, [4] Social distancing (remain 2 meters / 6 feet apart [5] avoid large crowds or (ideally) just stay at home and [6] if ill, self quarantine.

• Listen to the learned leaders who fully embrace time-honored scientific principles.

• Ignore the ignorance of the avaricious who elevate monetary matters over moral values.

 

 

 

Classic Comedy Attribution:

¹Monty Python’s Flying Circus

²Source Unknown

 

 

 

 

 

Hi Gene! Hygiene Lesson, Too! ~ COVID Vid of the Day

During Match Game’s Seventies era run on the CBS network, affable host Gene Rayburn’s clowning around / hamming it up had kept the ratings up… as did the other factors in play…

Celebrity Panelists… the wit and wisdom of regulars such as Richard Dawson, Brett Somers and Charles Nelson Reilly and the semi-regulars, such as Joyce Bulifant, Bill Daily, Patti Deutsch, Fanny Flagg, Elaine Joyce, Dick Martin, Marcia Wallace and Betty White.

Staff Announcer… Johnny Olson’s inviting, palpable enthusiasm also kept viewers loyal.

Behind the Scenes…  technical professionals, stage hands, construction / custodial crews, office workers, etc. also ensured everything would run smoothly / appear at its very best.

Staff Writers… consistently cooked up a slew of clever, oft surreal and off beat, fill in the blank scenarios, for Rayburn to present to the celebs, contestants and playing along studio / home audiences, alike.

Which all leads us up to the discussion of just one of these writers’ well-known fictitious characters… Dumb Donald… a.k.a. the hapless man who stumbles clumsily and cluelessly through life.

It is, indeed, tempting to bestow, upon each wordsmith, an almost ethereal, mystical, soothsayer persona. After all, their ages ago, Fake Donald oft bears an uncanny resemblance to a present-day, similarly challenged character… a.k.a. the Real Donald.

Which now leads us to the discussion of our above clip, where Gene will present the following, fill in the blank situation to all folks present then and now… inclusive of contestant Lizetta…

“Dumb Donald was so dumb…. when his
wife told him to wash with Dial™, he took
a _________ into the shower with him.”

While we’re all deliberating, in our attempt to divine the definitive response, let’s consider how the Fake and Real Donald’s paths have, once again, crossed.

Initially… it’d be totally in character for wife Melania to order her lying, cheating, bed hopping, dirty scoundrel of a husband to hit the showers. Hell, considering his reputation of hobnobbing with porn stars and playmates, it’s a wonder she hasn’t changed her fashion statement by now. I mean, who’d blame her, were she to don a Hazmat™ Suit 24/7?

Additionally… while we’re on the subject of communicable diseases, let’s talk about the Coronavirus / COVID19 crisis. Washing our hands frequently in hot water and sudsy Dial™ (and other soap brands)… for at least 20 seconds each time… does afford us one of our best defenses. That action, in tandem with staying at least 2 meters / 6 feet away from ill / suspected ill people, not touching our eyes, noses and mouths, covering our mouths when we cough and/or sneeze, and avoiding the greeting / parting kisses and handshakes will also keep us healthy and alive.

And that said, let’s PB the above clip to discover Lizetta’s response and how many celebs she’ll match.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Literal and Liberal Hand Washing Efforts Are Advisable

 

Common sense is humankind’s first line of defense against the coronavirus / COVID19. A highly recommended, twofold, hand washing strategy does comes into play. The particulars…

Now (Worldwide): Literal, regular usage of soap and water to help slow the transmission of this microbial scourge.

Later (Stateside): Liberal usage of Election Day ballots to help cure Washington DC of the societal scourge known as Donald J. Trump.

Figuratively speaking, the fake prez has become an all too real, unwitting, opportunistic, secondary disease. Multiple conditions have facilitated the birth and ferocity of the TRUMP17 Virus. The Devil is in the Details…

Donald is debilitated by narcissism… his admin is sickened by nepotism. Coupled with his ignorance, petulance and persistence, that compels him to downplay the seriousness of COVID19… which can only aid and abet its transmission AND fan the flames of what may already be a pandemic.

Just how deadly could the TRUMP17 and the COVID19 alliance become. Only time will tell…