Just prior to high noon, come January 20, 2021, we eyewitness the desperately clinging to power, Donald J. Trump, in the midst of, yet, another of his ferocious, rampaging, psychotic episodes. He’s pumped up on both Rx’d and ill-gotten, industrial strength narcotics, too. That harmful drug interaction’s side effects include split personality, superhuman strength and anal leakage.
In that incapacity, international terrorist Donald bin Laden, has crapped his pants while repurposing the resolute desk, furniture, assorted statuary, bric-a-brac, etc. to barricade all ingress to the Oval Office. He’s now taken to Twitter to Tweet out his odious terms and threat:
“If Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts does not administer the Oath of Office to ME, instead of Joe Biden; if the hugest Inauguration Day audience, ever, is not raucously chanting ‘Twenty-Four More Years’ and ‘Sieg Heil’, I’ll launch the nukes and mushroom cloud the entire freakin’ world.”
At that horrific juncture, the Secret Service tacticians will be convening an emergency staff meeting to weigh their options. Little doubt, at the very least, there’ll be two game plans on the table.
PLAN A: Sever all of Donny’s links to the outside world, break out the battering ram, storm into the Oval Office and bark out the ultimatum:
“Listen up scum wad! EITHER we’ll drag you out kicking and screaming OR you can salvage what little is left of your self-respect and permit us to promptly frogmarch you off the premises and into the dumpster of history.”
PLAN B (Phase 1): Have Donny’s best buddy, TV’s propaganda minister Sean Hannity, talk him down. With bullhorn in hand, he’ll cajole the fake prez into granting entry to a Judge Roberts doppelgänger, who’ll inform him that a chauffeur driven, armor-plated stretch limo (well-stocked with his all-time, fave fast food), is parked out front to whisk them both off to the National Mall. En route, the fake prez will pig out on Egg McMuffins, Big Macs, Filet-O-Fish sandwiches and wash it all down with a supersized, Diet Coke (spiked with a powerful animal tranquilizer).
PLAN B (Phase 2): Once groggy Donny comes to, he’ll be locked up within a maximum security, mental institution; a perfect White House replica. It’ll then be incumbent on faux Roberts to duly warn Trump that a sudden, climate change fueled tempest has rendered the windswept, rain-soaked Inaugural site an inundated disaster area. VainMan Trump, facing down the prospect of a bad hair day, little doubt, will become amenable to taking his Oath of Office right within the Oval Office; especially when reassured that the television camera will be beaming and streaming the proceedings, worldwide, to an audience numbered in the billions.
PLAN B (Phase 3): From that day onward, Trump will be fed a steady diet of fake news, e.g.,  all the world leaders have relinquished their power to him; have pledged their undying, unconditional subservience,  all 7.8 billion souls, worldwide have also pledged their everlasting devotion  the U.S. Constitution has been stuffed into the shredder,  Pope Francis has declared him God and  owing to a gaggle of moonlighting, Operation Warp Speed, white lab coated medicos, he has attained immortality.
ALL PLANS NIXED: In reality, Donald J. Trump will establish a new platform / network from which to launch his shadow presidency; for the express purpose of exacting revenge via his sabotage of Joe Biden’s best efforts to end the pandemic, climate change, systemic racism, misogyny, homophobia, inequality, poverty, etc.
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