Carson’s “Who’s On First” Parody ~ Vid of the Day

Considering our present-day sorry state of affairs… especially within my homeland… I figured it was high time for some hijinks… especially tomfoolery of the wordplay variety. And nobody did it better than the King of Comedy… Johnny Carson… and his brilliant team of writers. I mean, seeing how we’re all here @WordPress, how much more appropriate could wordplay ever be?

This Vid of the Day is also a reminder of a political era where America still had its sense of humor AND how… as bad as the Reagan years were… we could still hang on to our hopes for a better day.

In any event… I do hope you got a charge out of viewing this Carson Comedy Classic sketch… I know I did.

 

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Tear Down (Your Plans For) This Wall!

 

In keeping with his campaign promise, #45 is now chomping at the bit to break ground on his $8 – $12 BILLION wall along the southern U.S. border… and to (somehow) force Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto to pony up.

Well, as we already know, there’ll be no such payment… which all leaves #45 in a bit of a quandary. Or does it?

Has he forgotten about the furniture within his Manhattan palace? And, no, I’m not suggesting he sell it off.

All he need do is check between the living room sofa cushions for those BILLION$… what he’d consider chump change. It’s bound to be hiding there.

Of course he had better dig a bit deeper because it’d appear that his guesstimate has been way too conservative. The more realistic price tag attached to his wall could easily fall within the 40 BILLION BUCK range… so says one expert, Konstantin Kakaes.

Another predicament? Maybe not.

Obviously, it’d be a YUGE [sic] stretch, but, it’d behoove #45 to behave a bit more like #35 (a.k.a. John F. Kennedy)… to deep six this wall… to understand that waging and winning a war on poverty is a far more productive, permanent project… to accept that this would all take more time and patience… but it’d be well worth it!

The best part of this… it’d require finding “only” 30 of those 40 billion bucks and then utilizing it to feed ALL 870 Million of our world’s undernourished and starving people (btw, be sure to read Leen Abdallah’s Blog).

No fooling… for $30 billion no one would go hungry for ONE FULL YEAR!

Yes, at first #45 would need to assume the role of Santa Claus. But, as his “elves” would be delivering this humanitarian aid, they’d also be building the foundation of good will, worldwide. What’s imperative here is the fed recipients would need to be fully aware that the U.S. is their benefactor. After all, it goes against basic human nature, to “bite” the hand that feeds you.

At that point it’d be time for the U.S. to build on two astute and timeless sayings…

“Idle hands are the devil’s workshop.”

-and-

“Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime.”

In subsequent years, #45’s helpers, if doing their jobs properly, would be instilling a strong work ethic within their “fisher folk” along with the accompanying feelings of satisfaction one generally gets upon reflecting upon a job well done at the end of each workday.

Eventually, criminal activity… and in some instances even terrorist activity… would be on the wane… if for no other reason than honest work gives everyone purpose… prevents idle hands and minds. Not to make light of this but folks would be yawning too damned much to even listen to devilish recruiters (e.g. ISIS).

Yes, stronger, happier humans make for stronger happier homelands.

Ultimately, be it at America’s coastlines or borders, the folks attempting to enter would be friendly tourists… not illegally entering foes. For those who chose to emigrate, with nothing to fear about them, Americans could always welcome them with open hearts, minds and arms.

However, for potential émigrés, it’d would likely be a tough choice to make since their homelands would be just as attractive as America… maybe even more so… after all…

“There’s no place like home.”

 

Bad Political Traits Oft Breed True

America’s Founding Fathers had conceived of the Electoral College to prevent voters from picking pathetic presidents. Unfortunately, too frequently, these College “students” have “flunked out”. They’ve failed to perceive negative character traits and ideological mutations, which pollute the political gene pool… breed true… resulting in one lousy administration propagating the next.

Let’s assign a title to this political procreative process…

The Book of Political Genesis

In the beginning there was Ronald Reagan’s revolting régime… which begat George H.W. Bush’s thousand points of blight… which begat Bill Clinton’s Animal House Oval Office… which begat war criminal / torturer George W. Bush’s reign of terror…

Ronald Reagan ~ In violation of Logan Act of 1799 (which expressly forbids private citizens from meddling in foreign affairs), private citizen Reagan executed an end run around President Jimmy Carter to cut a secret, dirty deal with Iran’s Ayatollah Khomeini, who agreed to delay releasing his 52 U.S. Embassy hostages. That made Carter look wimpy in the eyes of the voters and, in turn, assured Reagan victory. Reagan’s payoff to Khomeini was providing him sufficient quantities of US arms and spare parts to help Iran fight their war against Iraq.

In essence, Reagan had prolonged the hostages’ misery… indeed, had endangered their very lives… just for his own political gain.

With that dirty deal with Iran under his belt, Ronnie then raged onward to mercilessly bust labor unions and, via Reaganomics, devastate the American / global economy… plunge the middleclass into poverty… the already impoverished into abject squalor.

George H.W. Bush ~ Reagan’s VP succeeded his X-boss and succeeded at heaping yet another four years’ worth of Reaganomics manure upon the downtrodden masses. He wound up mucking up the U.S. economy so badly that the PO’d voters were more than ready to vote for a Democrat, instead.

Bill Clinton ~ His “It’s the economy, stupid,” presidential campaign catchphrase resonated well with average Jane and Joe voters. He had successfully ridden the tidal wave of voter discontent to rid America of GHWB.

Alas, Billy Boy’s inability to keep his pants zipped up only served to screw up his image. His Republican opponents constantly had him in political CYA mode. In other words, Billy’s infamous female intern, Monica Lewinsky, had helped him blow away a brighter future for America.

And that, in turn, tarnished the image of Clinton’s VP, Al Gore, who had had high hopes for perpetuating eight more years of Democratic Party values. Instead, Billy’s sexcapades had put the voters into a “throw the bums out” mood, which had afforded Gore’s Republican opponent, George W. Bush, the ILLUSION of maturity, morality and respectability.

George W. Bush ~ Knowing he could not win merely on smoke and mirrors, alone, he needed help. Entering stage (far) right was Florida Governor (and W’s own brother) Jeb, who gleefully corrupted the Sunshine State… morphed it into a devoid of free elections Banana Republic “nation”. The net result was a too close to call tally of that state’s ballots.

Following Election Day, for over one month, the political firestorm blazed. The flames were soon licking at the doors of the corrupt U.S. Supreme Court, where five rabidly unscrupulous, archconservative judges practically soiled their underwear in ecstasy while coming to the aid of the lawless Bush family. It hadn’t bothered them, in the least that their ruling had denied Al Gore the recount, which he had been legally entitled to. All that mattered to them was installing the corrupt King George II.

But, after only seven months in office, W had grown listless and bored. Ergo, he decided to take a much-undeserved vacation. So eager to slack off, he had flipped off his August 6, 2001 Presidential Daily Briefing… an ominous heads up, titled:

“Bin Laden Determined To Strike in US”

Had W heeded that warning, as it turned out, he would’ve had five weeks to beef up America’s defenses. Seeing how W had chosen not to lift one finger to thwart al Qaeda’s evil plot to take out America… did zip zero nothing to preserve, protect and defend America while Osama’s assault was going down… it becomes easy for us to conclude that the Bush 43 admin had actually wanted America to be attacked.

Even worse, W’s wranglers put a spin on his getting caught with his CIC pants down… created the flat out ILLUSION that their little wittle boy president was a big badass, courageous leader (well at least they correctly assessed the “ass” part of his image).

What ensued next was not a pretty picture. W opted to go to war against an ideology… one, which knows no specific geographical location. He first deployed the troops to bomb the crap out of Afghanistan’s boulders and dirt and then trained his crosshairs on Iraq’s oil.

W told bald-faced lies to the U.S. Senate to give them the impression that Saddam Hussein had ties to 9/11… to successfully dupe Senators into green lighting a bogus war against Iraq.

Ergo, on March 19, 2003, W needlessly deployed U.S. troops… unnecessarily put them in harms way. The resultant destabilization of that entire region has made our world a far more dangerous place.

As of my blog posting time, war criminal mass murderer / torturer W is the butcher who slaughtered an estimated 251,000 people, inclusive of 4,497 American troops.

Barack Obama ~ His administration has been the rare exception… one where recessive, good political traits have surfaced. Enjoy them while they last because his likely successor will be…

Donald Trump ~ He exhibits outrageously inappropriate ignorant, insensitive, incendiary, sexist, and racist attitudes which are totally unpresidential and do not represent what the real America is all about.

But, he is correct about one thing. His telling us the 2016 November elections will be rigged. But, what he isn’t telling us is that he will be the one who’ll be rigging them. Most assuredly, he has the wherewithal to muck everything up just to try to sate his own massive ego and political lust.

Since the Electoral College “class of 2016” is likely to flunk out just like their predecessors… Trump’s bad political traits will breed true. As for what that will begat?