Fortune Cookie Blog (freedom’s typo?)


Freedom will be forsaken whenever and wherever a F’ing Fascist
fools fools into feeling undue, unconditional, limitless love for him;
into professing to him their fervent, ferocious, F’d up faithfulness;
into even lavishing onto him a torrential flood of unearned flattery.
A hybrid word must be formed that’ll describe the lost llberty that
the fooled fools will be facing down; that word being FREEDUMB!






Fortune Cookie Blog (lust)


A loudmouthed, empty suit Fascist will resort to bluster to fabricate
his only skin deep, fake, illustrious image. Hmm… is it ONLY a fluke
that within both bLUSTer and ilLUSTrious, the word LUST is hidden?
After all, other than a LUST for power, what else can a Fascist claim?






Dumb Donald Goes for the Gold? (Vid of the Day)

Nearly fifty years prior to the Real Donald becoming the fake prez, clever, clairvoyant(?) Match Game writers created slice of life scenarios for their fake character, Dumb Donald, to contend with. When we compare yesterday’s Donald to today’s, we find they do share certain traits in common… in this instance… their lust for gold… and inability to thoughtfully manage their acquisition of it.

In our above clip, game show emcee Gene Rayburn asks contestant Jessica to fill in this blank…

“Dumb Donald is so dumb, when he went to the
Olympics and won a gold medal, he had it _____.”

Hmm… come to think of it…

For the Real Donald… a chronic couch potato… to ever wind up winning any Olympic gold, the National Olympic Committee would need to come up with several brand spanking new, custom-made (Trump specific), easy for Donny to win events… e.g….

• Most Burger King™ Whoppers™ scarfed down in 5 minutes.
• Most flat out whoppers told during a 10 minute stump speech.
• Most incoherent, 280 character Tweets™ posted in 5 minutes flat.
• Ability to yell louder than the typical Marine One helicopter.

Decathlon Don Event:

• Most impressive sniffling, whining, droning, one-upmanship,
bad-mouthing, boasting, bellowing, bleating, belching and farting.


Anyway… let’s take a look at our clip to hear Jessica’s response and see how many celebs she’ll match…







Whistle-Blower Pooches & Political Dogs (Vid of the Day)


If it’s, indeed, true that the world is going to the dogs, let’s hope our clip’s three featured pooches are leaders of the pack.

Granted, humankind’s best friends are not always well-behaved. However, unlike some humans, when confronted, they oft display a far more refined, superior sense of right and wrong… are far more willing to fess up to their transgressions… to feel the shame they have brought upon themselves.

That’s far more than can be said about politicians… namely…

• A certain, snarling, growling, lying through his teeth, guilty as hell, blatantly blameworthy, big-name political dog, who, stunningly, insists the never-ending, ever-growing list of his dirty deeds is “perfect”.

• The pack of rabid, howling wolves, who always have his back.







Chrissie Hynde’s Key Question (Vid of the Day)

Were we to emulate Pollyanna, it might be possible to pretend that the state of DC is OK. Alas, it actually takes a Doubting Thomas state of mind to, correctly, call into question any member of the trumpeting, marching in lockstep conservative band. Hell, for all we know, this bloc of blockhead righties may’ve even sold their souls to the devil (and that would not, necessarily, be referring to Satan).

Members of the White House Press Corps do know, first hand, just how tough it is to cover a regime that’s tragically, typically and toxically Anti-First Amendment. How toxic? Well, let’s just say that had the fake prez been present, he would’ve been cheering on, egging on and getting off on being an eyewitness to the thugs who were sadistically, (literally) hacking journalist Jamal Khashoggi to death.

Indeed, only a dare devil journalist would risk getting a Sharpie™ squiggled in strategic, final “e” added to her/his Press Corps title… i.e., retribution for asking whomever is standing behind the White House’s Press Briefing Room dais, this Key Question:

“How much did you get for your soul?”

Which, btw, is Pretender Chrissie Hynde’s lyrical hook to and title of our Vid of the Day’s featured song.

Her composition could easily become any left leaning, political parodist’s dream come true, too.

Yet, even AS IS the Pretenders are not pretending when they turn in a live performance that’s totally enjoyable.









Dumb Donald’s Bungled Xmas Biz (Vid of the Day)

The 1970s era Match Game writers… perhaps channeling some uncanny abilities for foreseeing the real world of the future… came up with oodles of slice of life scenarios for their fictitious Dumb Donald character to thoroughly muck up… not unlike today’s all too real Donald.

And seeing how the latter Donald also insists that everyone says, “Merry Christmas” (even to non-Christians?) this clip takes on an even stronger significance during this holiday season.

Game show host Gene Rayburn will now pose one such Dumb Donald, fill-in-the-blank question for contestant Cynthia to mull over. Let’s see how many celebs she winds up matching…